Just A Fool
by feebes86
Summary: Leah loves Sam. Sam loves Leah but imprints on Emily. Can Sam and Leah beat the odds to be together? Oneshot written for the Tricky Raven Silent Auction Fundraiser.


Disclaimer: the characters and all recognizable situations belong to Stephanie Meyer - Last I looked I wasn't her... this story is a work of fan fiction, except for the legends and histories of the Quileute Nation that, of course, belong to them.

Song "Just A Fool" by Christina Aguilera and Blake Shelton, I just borrowed the title, no copyright infringement is intended.

Beta: MrsTrentReznor and Prereader: Reign

This story was written as part of the Silent Auction Challenge on Tricky Raven. I was lucky enough to have the fantastic and amazing Reign to bid, and win, me.

The Prompt…

"Well, I'm not that big on playlist fics. But sometimes things get in my head and latch on like leech. (Oh, yes I'm that sad to go there.) The song I have stuck in my head is "Just a Fool" by Christina Aguilera and Blake Shelton. It just screams Leah and Sam to me. I would really like it to be about them beating the odds for once. Hopefully, some lemony goodness too."

Here you go Reign. There really isn't any lemony goodness because I just couldn't see Sam as a cheater. I hope you aren't disappointed and thanks for bidding on me.

_**Lyrics to Just a Fool**_

_**(Christina Aguilera)**_

_Another shot of whisky please bartender  
Keep it coming til I don't remember at all  
How bad it hurts when you're gone (na na na)  
Turn the music up a little bit louder  
Just gotta get past the midnight hour (uh huh)  
Maybe tomorrow it won't  
Be  
This  
Hard  
Who am I kidding  
I know what I'm missing_

You  
I had my heart set on you  
But nothing else hurts like you do  
Who knew that love was so cruel  
(Yeah yeah yeah)  
And I  
Waited and waited so long  
For someone to never come home  
It's my fault to think you'll be true (yeah yeah)  
I'm just a fool  
(Yeah)

_**(Blake Shelton)**__  
I said that I don't care  
I'd walk away whatever  
And I tell myself we were bad together (uh huh)  
But that's just me trying to move on  
With  
Out  
You_

_**(Both)**_

But who am I kidding  
I know what I'm missing

Hey  
I had my heart set on you  
But nothing else hurts like you do  
Who know that love was so cruel  
(Yeah yeah yeah)  
And I  
Waited and waited so long  
For someone who never comes home  
It's my fault to think you'll be true (yeah yeah)  
I'm just a fool

_For holding on to something that  
Is never ever gonna come back  
I can't accept that it's lost_

I should have let it go  
Held my tongue  
Can't fight the motion  
Cause now everything's so wrong  
I'm thrown

I'm just a fool  
A fool for you  
I'm just a fool

I had my heart set on you  
And nothing else hurts like you do  
Who knew that love was so cruel  
(Yeah yeah yeah)  
And I  
Waited and waited so long  
For someone who never comes home  
It's my fault to think you'll be true (yeah yeah)  
I'm just a fool  
I'm just a fool  
I'm just a fool

It's my fault to think you'll be true  
(Yeah yeah yeah)  
I'm just a fool

**Just a Fool**

**Leah**  
I never thought that things would end up this way. I mean, growing up we had all heard the legends, we all knew the stories about vampires, werewolves and imprinting.

I snorted.

Fucking imprinting, I used to think it was such a romantic notion, who knew the truth would be something different?

"Ready for another one?" Joe, the bartender asked.

"Yeah, hit me up and keep 'em coming." It wasn't like it would make much of a difference; it was next to impossible for me to get drunk. Especially off this stuff, now the Rez shine on the other hand... that might have done the trick. Too bad I hadn't thought about raiding Old Quil's cellar. I could have already been on my way to oblivion.

I sighed and tried not to feel sorry for myself. There wasn't anything I could do to change the situation. It was the curse of being who, or in my case, what I was. I was an anomaly, the first and only female werewolf of the Quileute nation, ever. As if being a shape shifting wolf wasn't bad enough by itself, I had to share the minds of nine teenage guys, one of them my brother and one of them my ex.

The ex that I was still in love with.

The same ex that had taken one look at my cousin and best friend, fallen head over heels in love with and now tried to act like I didn't exist.

The ex that knew that I still loved him.

The same ex that I could swear still had feelings for me.

I shook my head. There was no use in trying to change the past, I couldn't go back and not introduce them.

I downed my drink, pulled the lone sliver of ice in my mouth and bit it in half. It didn't last long with my temperature.

"Hey Joe," I yelled.

The friendly bartender walked the length of the counter and then leaned down on his forearms.

"Need another already Leah?" He asked with some concern. It wasn't like me to sit and try to drown my sorrows.

"Yeah… it's a… bad night. No, actually… it's been a bad day." That was a fucking understatement.

Joe topped off my glass and went to put the whiskey back behind the counter.

I put my hand on his arm, stopping him. "Just leave the bottle here," I pleaded.

He stared into my eyes and whatever he saw must have convinced him that I was serious, that I needed to have this respite.

With a terse nod he sat the bottle by my glass and walked off to serve the others at the bar.

I drank down the shot he gave me and wondered if maybe I could get drunk if I emptied the bottle down my throat fast enough. I shrugged, it wouldn't hurt to try.

I poured a double and tossed it back, grimacing slightly at the burn. I poured another and then turned on the stool and looked around the room. There was an empty booth in the corner; it was out of the way, deserted… kinda. The jukebox wasn't too far from it. The speakers would be loud, especially for someone like me. But maybe the music could drown out my thoughts. I made my decision. I picked up the bottle and my glass and headed toward the darkened area.

It was just after ten and I still had two hours until this day was over. I hoped, no, I prayed that next year it wouldn't be as bad. It couldn't be as bad.

Ah fuck… who the hell was I trying to kid? Every day was bad and more than likely, it would still be this bad next year.

Imprinting… it fucking sucked!

I took a deep breath and tried to bolster my courage. I just had to get through the rest of this day. That was the same thing that I told myself every morning when I got up. It was what I chanted to myself, every time I saw them together. Could I help it if today it was harder to believe?

This was one day of the year. It just so happened that it was an anniversary for us. It was the same day that Sam and I had first gone out. The same day, a year later, that I had first allowed him to made love to me. And the same day, the following year, that he had chosen to propose. I had no doubt that had he not imprinted, this would have been the day that we had gotten married.

I should have been on my fucking honeymoon!

Instead, he was with her, his beautiful but scarred imprint and my former best friend. While I sat here, feeling sorry for myself and trying to make myself forget in a fifth of whiskey. A now almost empty fifth of whiskey.

I stirred the amber liquid in my glass and took another sip. I gave up. It was pointless to try not to think about it.

Sam and I had grown up together. He was older than me by a couple of years and I had harbored a crush on him from the time I was in elementary school. As sad as it was, I had never even looked at another guy.

I still couldn't.

From the start, I had known that we were perfect for each other. I had never imagined that we wouldn't be together forever. We had just clicked¸ two pieces of a puzzle, yin and yang. We were like Bonnie and Clyde, Tarzan and Jane, Johnny and June, a couple, destined to be a part of a fantastic love story, or so I had thought.

Instead we were like Taha Aki and the second wife, the one that was pushed to the side for the new, upgraded, life changing model.

It was fucking depressing. It was fucking cruel. And it fucking hurt. Nothing had ever hurt like this before. Nothing ever would again.

I propped my chin in my hand and sat there, looking at the people in the room. My situation was worse though, at least the second wife didn't have to share a pack mind with Taha Aki. She didn't have to see the love and adoration that he felt for the newer version.

She didn't have to watch their intimate moments through a shared consciousness and remember what it had felt like to be touched by him… kissed by him… held by him… loved by him. I was reminded daily of what I was missing.

I guessed that it wouldn't be so bad, if the memories of the two of us weren't so fresh, but I just couldn't forget them. Who knew… maybe by the time I was sixty or so, I might be able to think his name without that stab of pain.

We had made love that day, the day that he imprinted on Emily. We had just left his house, going to mine to eat, when I realized that she was there. I had been waiting on her to show up and yes, I expected her, but she had arrived earlier than she was supposed to. I walked into the house, Sam following closely behind me and greeted my cousin. I turned and introduced them and BAM… I was replaced. With one single look, years of memories, well thought out plans, our future, was pushed to the side. I just didn't know it until later.

I downed another shot and poured the last of the bottle into my glass. I glanced up at the clock and realized that I still had an hour to go. Sixty minutes until this day was officially over.

Fuck! I finished off the bottle, stood, threw some money on the table and headed to the door. I had to get out of there. I just couldn't handle it anymore. I couldn't get drunk but maybe I could find some other way to make myself forget.

I walked outside into the rain and breathed deep of the cool evening air. It instantly cleared my head doing away with whatever bit of a buzz I had managed to get. I took off in a jog, concentrating on the sound of my feet hitting the pavement. I didn't pay attention to where I was going. I didn't care that I was getting soaked. I didn't even realize where I was, until I had to stop myself from going over the edge of the cliff.

I was miserable, but I wasn't suicidal.

I dropped to the ground and wrapped my arms around my legs. The tears started to flow and I couldn't stop them. I rested my head on my knees and cried.

I didn't notice the time passing, and I didn't notice that I was no longer alone, not until I felt him. It was just the soft touch of his hand on my shoulder, but it made the ache in my chest stronger.

"Leah…" The word was little more than a whisper.

"What are you doing here Sam?" The words sounded muffled and strange.

"I uh… I just wanted to check on you. I was on patrol and saw you running. I remembered what today was, what this day meant to both of us and I… um… I just needed to see you. I had to know that you were alright."

"You want to know if I'm alright?" I clarified. "Go home Sam. Go home and forget that you even saw me." I hopped to my feet in one smooth motion.

I turned and started down the trail to Third Beach.

His hand on my arm stopped me.

"Talk to me… please... this has been killing me."

"Let go of my arm."

"We can't keep doing this, talk to me."

"Let go of my arm." I repeated the words more forcefully.

"Lee Lee... will you hear me out? Please…"

I wrenched my arm from his grasp. "Go away Sam, I don't want to talk about it, especially not with you, and definitely not tonight."

"You have to understand, I couldn't help it. It wasn't my fault. I didn't mean to imprint on her."

I whirled around to face him. "Really? You are going to go there? Can't you see what this is doing to me?"

We stopped and stared at each other through the dripping rain. His body was rigid; his muscles tense, his hands were balled up into fist at his sides. His chest was heaving with the effort it took to control his breathing, and his eyes… they were glowing in the faint light that filtered behind the clouds.

"Can't you just leave me alone… let me work through this on my own?"

"No… I can't Leah… I've tried but it's just so—"

"Don't you fucking say it! You don't have the right to say that it's hard or difficult. You get yours, your happy ever after. All I get is a cold bed and a sleepless night full of memories, empty promises and dreams about what should have been."

"I didn't choose this!" he shouted. "This was forced upon me by the wolf. The wolf wants Emily but the man…" He held out his hand, and so softly it was almost a whisper, he said, "The man wants you. I... want you."

His simple words sent a pulse of hope through my body. Hope that I couldn't afford to have. Everyone knew how absolute imprinting was, and as much as I hated it, she was his imprint.

I turned away from him and closed my eyes, breathing deeply. Tears overflowed my eyes once again and started to run down my face. "Don't you think you've hurt me enough? Why would you stand there and lie to me? I know how you feel about her. I know the truth."

"No Leah, you don't, at least not completely. I admit that there is a part of me that needs to be around Emily. The wolf pretty much insists that I be close to her. In addition to that, she has wanted a lover and the imprint demanded that I be that for her. But that doesn't mean that I am in love with her. That doesn't mean that I don't think, almost constantly, about you. It doesn't mean that I don't remember the taste of you on my lips, or and how perfect you felt in my arms."

"I can't… I can't let myself believe you. You need to stop talking and just go home. Go home to her. I can't be the other woman… I won't let myself become second best."

"How can you say that? You could never be second best."

"But it's the way I feel… the way you made me feel. I waited Sam… waited for you to come home, waited for you to come back to me and then I waited for you to forget about her." I paused and took a deep breath, trying to calm my racing heart. "I'm a fool… I shouldn't even care what you do now, but I can't stop myself. I don't want to love you, but I can't make myself stop. I can't make myself forget you... us."

"And you think I can? You are all I ever think about."

I scoffed, "Yeah… did you forget that we share a pack mind?"

"I lied Leah. I lied to myself and I lied to you. That was the only way… the only way I could possibly let you go and this…" he shook his hand back and forth between me and him, "I have had to try to make myself believe that she is it for me. But now… I'm just tired of fighting it. I'm tired of pretending that she is enough for me. I'm tired of being away from you. "

"Why haven't you told me this before?" I asked, afraid to believe him.

"Because..." He looked at me and the honesty in his gaze did more to convince me than anything else. "I didn't think it would be fair to you."

I snorted. "Like you are concerned about me."

He ignored my comment and kept talking. "I kept thinking that maybe, if you hated me, it would make things easier… for both of us. You could move on and I could accept the imprint, but it hasn't happened that way."

"I've tried to hate you."

"I know you have. I've tried to let you." He sighed and then looked down into my eyes again. "I'm a fucking fool. I should be able to walk away; let you live your life. I should let you move on. But I just can't let you go, even though it would be better for you, I just can't make myself accept the fact that I've lost you. It's too easy to remember how it was when we were together."

I didn't resist as he pulled me into his arms. He leaned his head down and rested his forehead against mine. Our breath mingled and I allowed myself a few brief moments of respite against the heartache that I knew would still be coming.

He paused, "Shit, this whole situation has been wrong. The wolf wants to be with her, but I can't not be with you."

Sam might think he was a fool, but I knew the truth. In all honesty, I could admit that I was the foolish one. I was crazy to allow myself to hope, or to get close to him again. It was stupid for me to harbor any thought that he could or would, be able to leave her and stay with me, and I knew that more times than not, he would keep me waiting. But just then, at that moment, I didn't care. I was in the comfort of his embrace and I wasn't hurting. That would be enough for now, it would have to be.

I didn't know how long we stood there. Motionless. Each of us just breathing the other one in. Time had ceased to exist. It no longer had any meaning.

And then he spoke the words. "Help me, Lee Lee. Help me come back to you."

I was afraid to breathe, afraid that I hadn't heard him right.

I opened my eyes to find him staring at me.

"What did you say?"

"I asked if you would help me, help me to leave her. I want you; I want to be with you."

"Sam, no one has ever-"

"I know what the legends say, that the imprint is absolute, but my wolf can't be right, not about this. I keep trying to understand how the wolf Gods could choose someone like her for me." He paused and seemed to collect his thoughts. "If she were my other half, then wouldn't the man and the wolf both want her? If she were truly meant to be my imprint, then wouldn't I be obsessed with thoughts of her? How can she be mine, if I can only think about you?"

I shook my head. "I don't know."

He pulled me tight against him and hugged me. "God, Lee Lee, you don't have any idea how good it feels to stand here and hold you in my arms. I don't ever want to let you go."

"I don't ever want you to," I muttered. I dropped my chin to my chest and snuggled into him. His scent was soothing and his arms were a luxury that I knew I wouldn't be able to keep for long. Was it so wrong? Would it be wrong for us to be together one last time? Could I deny myself the opportunity to have, for these few stolen moments, what I really wanted? Could I live with the pain if he left me again for her?

His lips brushed against the top of my head and his hand smoothed down the wet tresses of my hair while he held me close against him.

"Oh God, my Lee Lee, what have I done to you?"

I hoped that he didn't want me to answer him, because anything I could have said in response to his words would have hurt us both and right then, all I wanted was for the pain to stay away.

"Don't Sam, don't do this right now. Let's not talk; I don't want to argue with you anymore."

I leaned my head back and looked up at him.

He tilted his head to the side and in his eyes I saw love, need and desire. I knew that he had told me the truth. There was no way that he could look at me like he was, and still be lying to me.

His face inched closer to mine.

My breath caught in my throat.

And then he kissed me. It was like we had never been apart. It was like none of this had ever happened. It was like coming home.

Sam claimed my mouth with a driving force that overwhelmed my senses and made my knees weak. His lips were soft but still demanding, they covered mine and I nearly melted with the joy that surged through my body. His tongue traced my lips and I opened my mouth, my tongue seeking and then sliding against his. He tasted like rainwater and man. It was the taste that I knew intimately. It was a taste that I would now forever desire.

I couldn't stop myself from responding. I couldn't keep myself from taking what he was willing to give me. I buried my hands in his hair and tried to convey my every thought and need.

Sam pulled my body closer to his, until there was nothing, not even air, separating us.

I was being kissed by my Sam. I was in heaven.

It ended all too quickly.

He pulled away and drew in a ragged breath, "Fuck, Leah. Help me, help me talk to her. Help me convince her to let me go."

Hope filled my heart as I understood what he was saying. The imprinted wolf had to be whatever the object of the imprint wanted. If we could convince Emily to release Sam, then he would be free to be her friend or a brother, a protector or nothing at all. Whatever she wanted him to be. He would be free to love me again. I wouldn't have to hurt and I wouldn't have to accept the fact that he was lost to me.

I took his hand in mine and instantly noticed how comfortably we were joined, like his hand was made just for mine.

"Together?" he asked.

I looked up at him and saw the hope in his eyes. I nodded. I was afraid to believe that this would all work out. I was afraid to believe that she would let him go. But nonetheless, I did. I had my heart set on Sam, and if that made me a fool then so be it. I could live with that, as long as I had him.

It occurred to me that there was now one more memory to add to the list that made this day special. It was the day my Sam came back to me.


End file.
